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Use it or Lose it!!??
Posted:Feb 26, 2020 9:19 pm
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2020 9:24 am

OMG...I think I may have discovered this rare disease on Vivid Hookups!! But...it only affects humans with 2 balls, a dick and half a brain...(ladies, you're safe...phew!)...it's called "Sex-citis"....and...its contagious!!! Apparently what happens is...instead of neurons firing in the brain when a guy is stimulated by a woman on here...the neurons from the dick are fired up...so...when he goes to chat with a woman...its actually his dick thats doing the talking...(following me so far?). So...after they finish chatting... and this of course is after he says "i'll text u tomorrow"... ( because during their whole conversation he's begging to meet...but...they decide to plan something)...and he goes to sleep. Only to wake up the next morning with??? Yup...you guessed it...SEX-CITIS!! Because now...he's actually remembering what his dick told her the night before, but, his brain is saying...run away dickhead!! Did you forget that you don't actually like having sex??? That your afraid of women?? Your dick THINKS it knows what to do with a woman...but your brain is a scared little girl. I think you can have surgery to fix the problem...its called a "Sex-ectomy"! Really...they just have to go in and "snip" the nerve that connects the dick to the brain...( it prevents the neurons from firing and keeps the dick from over-heating...if you know what I mean...lol). Some even claim that the other half of the brain can actually start working again!! ( Well what do you know... a twofer!!) Of course...there's always those annoying little side effects...like limp dick...or...you know...the possibility of it just falling off one day as your walking down the street...( or..maybe in your hand...lol). But, that only affects a small percentage of the population. Lets face it...you really didn't need it cause you weren't using it anyway...remember???
1 comment
Posted:Feb 14, 2020 8:11 pm
Last Updated:Feb 26, 2020 7:56 pm

I know this is a sex site...we all agree on that...but...I truly have to say that I really don't think i've ever encountered more disgusting people in my life! (I'm talking about the guys of course...but I'm sure some of the women are just as bad!) I mean...are there ANY normal people left on this planet??? Come on...is it really too much to ask to at least try to be somewhat sane and normal!?? ( I would also think that if you were really trying to impress a chick on here...you know...to actually meet for sex...that maybe a normal guy would actually be a turn on...you never know...it might be a new strategy you might want to consider trying. Just a thought...). Anyway...when I think it can't get any worse..( silly me for thinking that)... it does. Then, I finally get that one message that is a complete and total opposite of what I normally get...you know...the.." I want to fuck that sexy ass of yours" message. (And ladies...when you get a message like that...please do yourselves a favor...and just turn and run!) It's an actual..."hi...how are you doing tonight" message. ( Don't get me wrong...alot of messages do start with the "hi...how are you?"...but...they turn ugly real fast!!) But...every now and then...I get that nice message that actually turns into a decent conversation with an actual normal guy! And tonight...i had one. And I have to say...when that happens...it kind of restores my faith in humanity.. a little....just knowing that there are some sane people still walking this earth. And...here's the best part... come to find out...they're looking for the same!! So...there's still hope for mankind...you just have to look" beyond"...and maybe you'll find that needle in a haystack. ( Just not on Vivid Hookups...it's still a sex site!) I honestly think Vivid Hookups is just a rest stop on the way to sex hell!!
Say Cheese!!
Posted:Feb 5, 2020 6:34 pm
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2020 7:48 pm

I was just wondering...how many "dick pics" does it take to make a whole dick?? And is it really necessary to take that one close up?? ( If I wanted to see pics of every man's penis up close and personal...I would have become a urologist.) I swear...I was looking at one guys profile the other night, and he had 33 pics posted. So...I clicked on the first one...dick pic...second one...dick pic...third one...dick pic...etc.. ( well...you get the gist of this). No lie...every pic on his profile was a dick pic!!! And, if that wasn't bad enough...I think he got every angle imaginable!! Why??? I don't know whether to be dumbfounded or impressed!? Do you think he used a "selfie stick" to get to those hard to reach places? Or...is it just imagination running amok? Maybe he's just flexible like that! It's kind of funny...because...almost every guy that I have chatted with on this site claim that they suck at taking selfies..( which they do). But, when it comes to taking that "dick pic" ...they become experts!! They can take the most perfect shot of their junk...but can't seem to get that phone above their waistline! It's like there's an invisible fence preventing them from reaching their face. Again...why??? We know you have one! The jig is up!! It's just 2 feet north of your dick...easy peasy! Just move your arm up slowly...you'll find it...we know you can...we have faith in you! After all...the penis isn't what defines a man...is it?
Well I Never...
Posted:Jan 31, 2020 8:58 pm
Last Updated:Feb 7, 2020 1:41 pm

Here we go....so I'm online tonight and i get an Im from a guy saying hi. I respond back hi and with that... he sends a face pic. I'm thinking...he's a good looking guy...I'm gonna keep chatting. But, he also looks a little familiar...so I ask him if we had chatted before. He says, i believe we had. So, I asked what happened? He said, I...(meaning me)... had stopped chatting with him. Honestly, I really don't remember, so i ask him why? He doesn't know why either, but, while we're chatting, i decide to check his profile for more pics and info. There's hardly any info...( astrology sign, willing to relocate, bday and straight and caucasian...i believe...oh and...no pics). So, I figured, he already checked out my profile...which is basically an autobiography...so I thought it was only fair if I asked a few questions and requested a few more pics.( I honestly didn't think anything of it). Well...you would have thought I had just asked for his pin number to his atm card and his right nut!!! He said..."it felt like he was being interviewed and he wasn't into that...I'm out"...that's when the fight started. I shot back with my usual plethora of rants...including...how he thinks 2 pics of him..(.one face...one top of shoulders with face)... shows he has an athletic build! That barely shows your human...let alone you have an athletic build...which btw is a requirement on my profile...if he even read it!!! And pardon me for asking your fucking height and if you are single!!!( Again, both of which are on my profile!). Do you really think that a hi and one face pic is gonna melt my vagina and send me running to you naked??? Get over yourselves!!! Stop acting like little girls on prom night!! Needless to say...I continued with a few more choice sentences and words...but...he couldn't keep up with my typing.( A word of advice...never compete with a pissed off woman when it comes to typing...you'll never keep up!) I think he gave up...smart man.
1 comment
Cock-A-Doodle Don't!!!
Posted:Jan 17, 2020 10:39 pm
Last Updated:Feb 7, 2020 1:42 pm

I'm beginning believe that the majority..(and i mean 99% of the guys on this site are either afraid of sex with a woman...or...just incapable. ( and by incapable...i mean they don't know what do with a woman...seriously.) And honestly, its pretty pathetic...since once again...this is a site!! Trust , I'm not just making this shit up either. Every day...without fail...guys almost always fall short..and end up doing exactly the thing....running like little girls. God forbid if they ever do what they claim they're so good at doing!!! You know...that thing!! I think that most of you are just scared of ...plain and simple. All you want do is hide behind your "boners"... rather than having with a woman...its the thing you're capable of doing...and be quite honest...it's not laughable... its just plain sad. I'm on because I enjoy having ...plain and simple. And I enjoy the whole aspect of ...meaning...the foreplay, the feel, the touch, the taste, the smell...yes...the REAL act of !!! I thought this site was a vehicle for just such occasions...but...I guess I was wrong. Because once again...I'm highly disappointed with most guys on . a handful of you...( and again...if your reading this...you know you are- and I'm talking about the guys i have had with...)...have proved themselves ...( and some of you still do...thank u for that...and you know how much fun we have together.) I have met some great guys...and will continue to...hopefully...as long as I am single. I love having fun, and I know there are guys on here want that as well...but...in order do that...you gotta bite the bullet and get your asses off the couch and go meet women!!! Stop doodling with your cock and let a chick doodle it!!!
"Goodwill" Hunting!
Posted:Jan 12, 2020 10:02 pm
Last Updated:Jan 31, 2020 9:20 pm

I swear...every time I log on to this site, it feels more and more like I'm shopping at freaking Amazon! When I view a guys profile...or he views mine...are we adding each other to our shopping carts? I wonder how much you guys are worth? Do you know? Is a single guy in his early 40's with a stable job, a house and a nice car worth more than a divorced guy with 2 living with him? Is he discounted or marked down because he comes with a damaged ego and baggage? Most times...it does feel like I'm shopping at Goodwill!! (at least at goodwill... I know there are alot of used and damaged "merchandise") but, aren't we all?? We're all marked down in some way or another. Whether it was bad relationships..(which lets face it... most on here are all a product of)...or...bad upbringing. It's true...if you treat people badly, then odds are, thats how you were treated by someone at some point in your life. Or...maybe you're still being treated badly. Still...it's no reason to perpetuate that cycle. I know what your thinking...it's only sex! Yes...it is! But, sex is only the physical part. And in order to get to the physical part...you need to get thru the mental aspect first. That means...establishing a connection thru talk...and that means actually treating people like humans...regardless of how you've been treated in the past, or are now. Even though we may belong on the discount shelves...doesn't mean we have to shop there. Where would you prefer shopping? Do you want "damaged" goods...or do you want normal? Personally, i would much rather shop at Amazon! Let's face it...you can get anything you want there!!
Me, Me, Me...I, I, I
Posted:Jan 5, 2020 11:09 am
Last Updated:Jan 11, 2020 8:27 am

Sooo...correct if i'm wrong...but..this is a sex site...right??? And in order actually have sex...well...you kind of have meet...(again, thats if you actually want the physical aspect of sex take place...and yes...that would be the touching part!). I'm still having a hard time understanding the "how" in this whole process. I know...I know...I've already written about this and have gotten some great feedbac..but...still no answers.( More like excuses...and not good ones either.) Just like a good boo..a movie...a day...life!! There's always a beginning..(which seems be quite easy)...maybe that starts with a "hi, how r u? What's your " Are you single?( which most lie about anyway). Then, we move on the middle. ( Thats where all the juicy stuff is..."what r u looking for? what do you like? who's your ")... LOL. Then...nada!!! Where's my end?? It's like a dangling participle!! Am I missing something??? Where's the disconnect?? At this point in the conversation...we will have already agreed upon a mutual attraction...( MAYBE by exchanging pics...that is if i don't have ask half a dozen times for one...I know...I know...guys suck at selfies ( I'll be following up this post with a lesson on selfies...sheesh...the things we women have do get laid!!) May I remind you...EFFORT goes a long way getting something you want...or... is it the chase that does it for you? Is that all you need? know that you CAN get women...that is...if you want. It's really not hard...we're really slow...pretty easy catch actually. Maybe... your not sure what do with us once you do catch us?? Is that the problem?? You suck at sex!!!?? Or...is it an "ego" thing? Does it feel good have your ego stroked instead of your cock?? Silly me !! What was i thinking? But...hey...whatever floats your boat! ( just stop inviting us onboard a sinking ship!) You would think, that having mind-blowing sex with a woman would be an amazing ego boost. Maybe you do actually suck at sex, (which is really sad because...lol...we're on a sex site!) Either way...your still doing it all wrong...at least in my boo Contrary popular belief..(.and I'm talking about your wives and girlfriends)...women actually do like sex!! And we do like be chased...but...we also like being caught. (win..wink) So, if you could just give your "egos" a little vacay...maybe we can find the ending we both want and crave...you know...finally finish something for a change. Trust me, your ego will thank you for it!!
May the best Man Finish?
Posted:Jan 3, 2020 11:26 pm
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2020 8:41 am

So...here's a new one...hot off the press! A guy messages me tonight telling me he's been trying to me...sounds urgent! So, i apologize for missing him...and we start chatting. Long story short...he's married..and far. I tell him, I don't like either...but he insists he could meet at a hotel. And he wants to meet...or so he says. We chat more...he likes exhibitionism ( I don't)... he wants to fuck me doggie style in front of the window at the hotel ( umm...not happenin)...he loves to hear about all my "other" guys...etc..etc. So, me being...well...me...I tell him. I'm not crazy about the window sex, but, I do love sex...and would be willing to meet as long as he can do it easily...( I generally stay away from married because they're too hard to deal with...you know...because of the "wifey"). So, we pick a night...and a tentative place. I ask if he wants my so we can communicate...and he says...no...we'll confirm on here Monday night. Aaannnddd... here we go....I said...thats not how i do this... I need to communicate off the site...or I won't meet... then I tell him, its not gonna happen. Anyway...I was talkin to myself..because...well...crickets. Yup...I guess he got his kicks for the night...fucking with me. How stupid and cowardly can you be?? Instead of fucking with me...he could have actually been fucking me if he wasn't such an idiot!! You guys really don't know anything!!! If your gonna games...at least get thru the first half!!! You wimps punt before the 4th down!!! Are you fucking premature with everything??? Are you capable of actually "finishing" anything??? Just wondering...smh again!
How are YOU Today??
Posted:Dec 30, 2019 5:23 pm
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2020 7:37 am

Is it necessary announce ...3 sentences into a message...that you are horny??? I mean...come on..I don't even know your fucking and you feel the need tell your horny!!?? Why?? Do you think i'm going jump in car and rush right over fuck your brains ?? Does that EVER work?? I know...I know...you're not thinking clearly because your brain is being deprived of blood...(which we all know delivers the oxygen...which gives you clarity...rationalization)....thereby making you stupid ...but...in ...its still not an excuse (so don't even try). And, while in this uncomfortable state, we know all the blood is rushing that particular part of your body...so your "big head" may have temporarily "left the building"...yet...i'm pretty sure can safely assume that not woman on is going come your aid. (That's a hint...it ain't gonna happen) But, that is...of course...if you want physical . I know alot of you guys on dread the touch of another human being...( that's a whole other blog!)...especially someone of the opposite ...(and you know you are)_...so all you're looking for is cyber , or sexting or flirting...or lets it...some of you need pics...and well...you're done!! Elvis has left the building!!! God forbid if another woman touches you!!! We're on a site...remember??!! If you're not horny when you log on...well...then...you're dead!!
Press 1 For SEX!!
Posted:Dec 19, 2019 11:41 pm
Last Updated:Dec 28, 2019 10:53 pm

Look, I'm really trying here, but you guys just insist on giving me more and more ammo!!! I can't help myself...I have a weakness for stupid shit!! Again...can somebody please explain this to me like I'm a 2 year old...please!!?? Why would anyone have auto-reply on a site where the idea is to meet people for sex??? Do you see where I'm going with this one? It's alot like the "no pic" thing. Are you expecting a woman to just fall into your lap? Again...it doesn't work that way! You have to communicate at some point if you want to actually meet!! I honestly thought the no pic was bad...but...auto-reply? Really? Is it that you get too many messages? Do you need a secretary...or personal assistant to screen all your messages. We're you voted "most popular" in high school and the stigma still follows you? Here's a thought... maybe you should just chat with us...you never know...maybe you'll actually get some sex of it!! Wouldn't that just be the icing on the cake!! Its really not that hard...just some friendly banter might get you laid...thats only if you really want that...just sayin.
Hook, Line and Sinker!!
Posted:Dec 18, 2019 9:18 pm
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2020 9:24 am

I swear...every time i log on to this site...i always end up shaking my fucking head!!! As a matter of fact...my head just starts automatically before I come on!! What the fuck is soooo hard about posting recent pics??? Have you ever heard of the technology age? Did you know you can take pictures with your phone now?? It's true!!! Do you really think that when you post pics that are 5 years old...or better yet...no pics at all...and when or if...( and that's a BIG IF)..a woman does decide to meet you that she's just going to over look the fact that you look nothing like the pics on your profile...and jump in bed with you anyway?? First of all, she's not going to be able to recognize you when you meet up...and if you do manage to convince her that you are in fact the person she's been chatting with...there is no way in hell that your going to have sex with her...( you'll be lucky if she even sits down). You guys need to understand something...we don't like being lied to and deceived!!! And I know what your thinking...they do it to guys too. I'm sure some do...but lets face it...women are alot more vain than men to begin with...( we get our hair colored, facials, manicure, pedicure..etc..)...so we age better anyway....guys don't...and we know that already...but guess what?...we don't care. We want to see what you look like...now!!! Not 2,3 or 5 years ago!!! We all looked younger then...because we were!!! Let us decide if we're attracted to you! I promise, if the attraction is mutual...and you talk nice..( lets not forget that part!)...you'll have her hook, line and sinker!!!
1 comment
D For Effort!!!
Posted:Dec 12, 2019 8:27 pm
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2020 7:38 am

Honestly...most days all I can do is just SMFH at you guys!!! ??? Most of you on claim that you are educated...( again, I'm basing this on the fact that its what's written on your damn profiles!!!), so, maybe I'm just missing something? Maybe its me...but I'm still having a hard time understanding why or what is soooo difficult about holding a conversation?? It's just forming thoughts in your brain...( you know..that round bowling ball type object, that sits 2 feet above your ass!)...then, transferring those thoughts into writing, texting or typing form...(I'm not even asking you to speak yet! ). But...for some odd reason...it's next to impossible for guys to accomplish this simple act. Is it something with your brains??? Is there a short circuit or crossed wires..( or maybe i should say wire?)...in there somewhere that prevents you from" performing" this simple task??? Do I have to remind you...AGAIN...that its for YOUR own benefit?? Again...women need to HEAR men say certain things to get and hold our attention!!! No talkie...no sexie!! Its that simple!!! After all...your the ones talk about being able "perform" all the time!! And how great you are at it!! Maybe I have spell it ...or...are you having trouble with letters too??? Just so you know...the letter at the top of this page is a DEEEEE!!!
1 comment
No TWO Are Ever Alike?
Posted:Dec 11, 2019 7:58 am
Last Updated:Dec 12, 2019 8:30 pm

Why is it that EVERY time i start chatting with a guy..and i ask for "a pic"...if i don't specify PIC...he always sends a dick pic????? Are you trying tell that your just big dick?? Do you think thats your best feature...or worse yet...your feature? Should I just assume you have a , arms and legs? And... heres the best part ...just because you do...I will like the rest of you? Again...we are on a site...and 99% of you guys are thinking with the "little head"...and I use that word loosely..( and I mean the word little). Yes, there are lots of different sizes and shapes...but does that answer that age old question....or statement..."If you've seen , you've seen them all"? Does it mean I have see them all?? I'm pretty sure I have...based on most of the profile pics on ...I'd say...I've accomplished that already..( check that off bucket list)...because thats pretty much EVERY profile pic!! 's the kicker...I can start chatting with a guy...I ask for a "" pic...he sends . We stop chatting...for whatever reason..(I'm guessing short attention span...but thats another blog)..then...a few weeks or month go by and he'll message me again...AND...based on his profile pic..( which is a "dick pic"!)...he expects me to remember him!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? Do you think I sit home every night memorizing all the dicks on ?? Is it a memory game thing?? Will I have pass a test meet you? I'm assuming every guy on has ...and therefore knows how use it...but...maybe I shouldn't assume. Maybe the guys on should provide better study tools? Just sayin...

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Use it or Lose it!!?? (2)notsure1949
Feb 27, 2020 6:30 am
Say Cheese!! (19)Sean14151415
Feb 17, 2020 6:53 am
Alien-nation (21)Sean14151415
Feb 17, 2020 6:52 am
"Goodwill" Hunting! (10)tedscott40
Feb 5, 2020 1:25 pm
Well I Never... (5)travellerabc123
Feb 5, 2020 2:15 am
Cock-A-Doodle Don't!!! (6)JustLookn439
Feb 2, 2020 5:28 am
How are YOU Today?? (7)sexoyplacer52
Jan 22, 2020 5:34 pm
Strike While the Iron is Hot!!! (26)Sean14151415
Jan 7, 2020 10:43 am
May the best Man Finish? (3)Sean14151415
Jan 6, 2020 11:12 am
Me, Me, Me...I, I, I (5)1Sexygoodguy11
Jan 5, 2020 6:37 pm
Press 1 For SEX!! (4)For_Kixx2020
Dec 31, 2019 11:52 pm